This is not a review. I will say this: for the most part, "I liiikkkeeedddd it....but!" I was looking for an old-fashion, swashbuckling adventure movie and Steven Spielberg still knows how to make one.Here are some qualms I had entering this movie:
- It will be a disappointing finale
TRUE - Let's face it, The Last Crusade is a tough act to follow let alone to have a worthy successor as a finale. - It will be hard to watch Harrison Ford get back into the role of Indiana Jones
TRUE... then FALSE - It started rough (almost forced) but he eventually broke out his inner Indy.
- Shia LeBoeuf will ruin this movie
A very surprising FALSE - He in no way made the movie but he didn't ruin it. In fact, he was more or less handled in a way to tell the audience: yes, Indy has aged.
- Cate Blanchett will be distracting in this movie
TRUE - What can I say? It's Cate-fucking-Blanchett! - I am really excited to see Karen Allen as Marion Ravenwood again
TRUE - I really don't have anything to follow this up with.
- This movie will be more in the vain of Temple of Doom
FENCE - Like Temple, it didn't involve an epic quest of, pardon the expression, Biblical proportions. And also like Temple, there was a grotesque scene involving a hord of insects. Though Temple still remains the far more superior movie (despite having a Willie Scott instead of a Marion Ravenwood). - There will be a lot of "yeah right"s in the audience
FALSE - There was a happy suspension of disbelief, the kind you should have when entering an adventure picture.
What bothered me (at the top of my head):
- The actual Crystal Skull and its legend
Luckily for me, I made it secondary in my mind (despite it sharing the title with our protagonist). Or maybe, as I mentioned earlier, no matter what its story, it was not going to match that of The Last Crusade, even as a stand alone episode. - The Beginning
It was just hard for me to get back into that world at first even though I started my Indiana Jones week on Monday with Raiders of the Lost Ark. The look and feel of it didn't catch up with me until I saw Dr. Jones in his class teaching (weird, I know). From there, I saw him meld back into the role, hat and whip and all. I welcomed it finally. - Gratuitous use of 50s music
Well, technically there were only two scenes, But we get it! We are no longer in the 30s. - Too many people along for the ride
Indy had an entourage.
What I liked (at the top of my head)
- The fear is still alive
Ya know what? After all those years, I'm glad that Indy never got over his fear of snakes. - Music by John Williams
The main theme? The Ark theme? Let's get serious! - His dry, cool wit
Some things don't go away with age. - Tip of the hat to Marcus Brody and Henry Jones Snr.
But where's Sallah? - A lot of LOL moments
I'll admit, this one was very funny. Not in the 'categorize as a comedy' sense, just that good ol' Steven Spielberg humour I both love and miss. - Hearing Indiana Jones say "I have a bad feeling about this."
Knowing we will never hear Han Solo say that popular Star Wars catch phrase ever again, hearing Harrison Ford say it again as the one and only Indy makes me feel all squishy.
And finally, Fun Facts:
- Commies are funner than Nazis
True story. They dance and drink vodka while Nazis burn books and search for historic Christian artifacts. - The guy behind us in the theatre is hilarious
[opening credits: "LucasFilm Ltd"]
girl: Is that George Lucas?
guy: No. It's his brother Roger Lucas.
- This is TOTALLY a review!
So to summarize my exhausting points: It neither ruined nor added to the Indiana Jones franchise simply because I separated it from the "other holy trinity" (the first "holy trinity" of sci-fi/fantasy film for me being the original Star Wars pictures.). I liked it enough as an enjoyable movie and some bits are tasty treats for the fans but am not fully convinced it was an Indiana Jones movie.
